Lighten Up Online

The quarterly light verse webzine

Bill Greenwell: About The Size Of It

(The journal Science reported that wild Hebridean sheep
are shrinking by two centimetres per year, but denied
that we could eventually expect to see pygmy sheep
being herded by chihuahuas.)

 

Barbarians are at the gate,
The wolf is howling at the door
But the hungry men are overweight,
And the wolf’s two inches from the floor:
Who knows how the future’ll morph?
An ogre may become a dwarf.

Think how great the motor car was,
When the price of gas was cheap.
Now we’re watching two chihuahuas
Rounding up some pygmy sheep:
The Great Bear’s started to deflate,
And unshrunk violets get the date.

What goes up comes down, you trust?
Watch the TV fill the room.
Every boom becomes a bust;
Every bust becomes a boom.
See the daffs as big as bells;
Observe how David Cameron swells.

London is reduced to Peckham;
The moon, unvisited, balloons.
Here’s super-size Victoria Beckham,
Chased by whalers with harpoons:
And politicians look like ants
In Ollie Hardy’s underpants.


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