To read the latest issue, click 'Issues by year' in the menu above

I cannot pass over, with both my thumbs pricking,
the barbaric digging and cutting and picking
of greenstuff and roots by the brutes who snuff out
the life of the carrot or parsnip or sprout!

Yes, the terrible treatment of taters and beets
grubbed up from their beds in the name of good eats,
then heinously hacked and tossed in a pot
to boil till their flesh is hellishly hot

is something that troubles the sensitive brain
since science has shown that lettuce feels pain!
But . . . as without food we would all disappear,
Five a day I'll force down, although shedding a tear.