Some swear my food is fairly crude
(Though heaven knows I've tried),
Like fricassees in feta cheese
And pancakes on the side.
The salmon steaks with berry shakes
Were not so well received,
While beetroot stew and choc fondue
Left many friends aggrieved.
I shall not be a chef, I see;
I'll never earn the hat.
They say No way! to gray brûlée –
I've made my peas with that.