To read the latest issue, click 'Issues by year' in the menu above

Does my bum look big in this?
The question made me reminisce,
for the answer it would bring
was, Yes, it's big in anything.

Now months of watching what I ate
leave me glad I'm overweight
with a new world to explore
as, true, I was obese before.

Where once I said, I've let it go.
My rear end's rhino-like, I know,
today, I don't seem half so dumb
since now I've got a monkey's bum.