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An alien who landed on Earth
Was intrigued by the way we give birth.
   Although disconcerting,
   She found it diverting
So remarked, with both horror and mirth:

“Our young ones, a bright healthy green,
Are always produced by machine.
    This avoids, to be plain,
    All that pushing and pain
Which, frankly, I find quite obscene.

Our leaders would certainly ban it.
Birth seems most unpleasant, so can it
    Be worth all the mess?
    No doubt you’d say ‘Yes’,
So I’m now heading back to my planet!"